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It's
easy to be fascinated by other people's love affairs and desire
to have what they have, especially if the relationship is intense,
happy, and seemingly problem-free. These great love stories
epitomize an ideal that everyone would love to attain.
However, keep in mind that you are seeing only the public image
of the relationship. You don't see the work that goes on behind
closed doors. All relationships take effort to be successful,
especially great love stories. |
Would
you like to make your relationship the greatest love story ever?
Of course you would; everyone would. If you would, just keep reading
along and learn how to do it. Before you know it, you will be transforming
your good relationship into a great one.Learn from Happy Couples
The
best way to learn about how to have the greatest love story ever
is to listen to how other happy couples do it. All you have to do
is ask or read about happy couples, and you will learnthe tricks.
For instance, in the book The 30 Secrets of Happily Married Couples,
author Paul Coleman tells how happy couples stay happy. His findings
are based on many research studieson marital happiness. Basically,
his 30 secrets can be summarized into three main goals that all
couples should have:
1.
Practice good communication. Communication skills include considering
the part you play in the problem, trying not to be defensive, and
seeing
the issue from your partner's perspective.
2. Have realistic expectations for a long relationship. Realize
that change
involves ups and downs and appreciate the effect that major changes,
such as having children, will have on your relationship.
3. Make time for each other. Make regular dates, have fun
together,
and take every opportunity to be affectionate.
These three goals sound like such a simple recipe for living happily
ever after,
but they require something that many people forget: daily commitment.
Daily
Commitment Is a Privilege
How many times have you heard someone say any of the following:
"I have to remember to get her a card," "I must buy
him a present,"
"I should take her out for dinner," or "I need to
call him"? Couples commonly
say these phrases. Having the greatest love story ever is not built
on things you
"have to do." Rather,it's based on feeling privileged
to be able to do them.
This difference in perception isthe difference between a happy couple
and a super-happy couple.
Building
the greatest love story ever is work that is never complete. Love
is a living, breathing thing that requires daily attention to keep
it alive. Just remember, if you put in the minimum work, it will
be reflected in the degree of happiness and satisfaction you feel
in your relationship. If you put in 100 percent, you will have a
relationship that gives you 100 percent fulfillment. This is the
kind of relationship others admire and strive for. Taking part in
the greatest love story ever requires a lifetime of privileged work-and
what an honorthat is to take on!
___________________________________________
Nancy Fagan, M.S., author of The Complete Idiots
Guide to Romance and Desirable Men: How to Find Them
has appeared on several hundred radio and television shows including
Ricki Lake, Men are from Mars/Women are from Venus, ABC News, NBC
News, CBS News, The Berman & Berman Show, FOX News. She has
been featured in most major newspaper in the United States and worldwide
as well as regularly mentioned in the nation's top magazines such
as Ladies Home Journal (Can this Marriage be Saved?),
Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Men's Health, Brides, Seventeen, Womens
Day, Family Circle, Womens Own, BBW, Complete Women and dozens
of others.
To read more, visit www.ExpertdatingAdvice.com
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